I wish I could teleport
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
