this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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