thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
