Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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