IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
