Sry I called you an 8
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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