Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
