i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Randomize
