tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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