I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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