Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
