do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
