I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Randomize
