If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
love makes seman taste better
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize