If i come over, it means nothing
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
