All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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