I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
only you would photoshop your dick
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
This is my gift to your gina
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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