I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
people are starting to question the shark bite story
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
It's rum buckets o'clock
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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