I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
The air taste purple.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
