remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
