dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
