kristin has been a bad kristin
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
