Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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