Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
