The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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