Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
The Olympian is in my bed
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
