I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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