the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
