just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
