I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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