Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
