absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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