I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
