I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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