He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
