remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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