Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
