he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize