Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
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