Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
