Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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