I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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