weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
