he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
