Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
