try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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