shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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