Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
