Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
