Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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